Step 4
The Strength to Stand Again
Often in our lives we will have
moments, sometimes very long day, week, or longer type moments, which
we will feel we have fallen flat on our face or back. The results of
our lives will fail to go in the planned or even desired direction.
Feelings of confusion and that we have lost our place will fill our
minds. We will find fault and be stressed out by the actions of
others where they have done nothing wrong or stressful, but we have
changed the place we stand and become agitated by actions that would
otherwise have been harmless or welcomed. Friends can turn into
unwanted companionship, and friendships themselves can deteriorate
because we avoid caring for them because the weight of our present
burden overshadows the value of everything else that is truly good in
our lives. I don't think anyone will argue with me if we simply label
this as “trials” in our lives.
What happens that causes us to lose
our way? Have we fallen so far down that we can't recover? Have
others pushed us so far back it hurts to move forward again? In
reality, we haven't really moved that far at all. We hurt because we
fall, and we radiate that pain outwards subconsciously, not
necessarily because we want others to hurt like we do, but in large
case because the experience we are enduring is foreign to us in it's
present state. There may be aspects we are familiar, but most
experiences, even repeated ones, bring with them a new set of aspects
that are foreign to us. When this happens we begin to either bottle
everything inside or turn it all outward, depending on the
personality of the individual, and we share it with others. This
sharing could be blatant and implied, or subtle and unintentional, or
a mix of both. But the truth is as I said: When we fall, we haven't
really moved that far at all, if we have moved at all.
Image in you would looking up at the
ceiling. It's really not that far. Most of us can reach up to it and
either touch it, or if you're a little shorter like myself have your
fingertips get a handful of inches from it. Now imagine laying down
on your back on the floor right where you had been standing and
reaching up towards the same ceiling. Lets say your eyes are roughly
ten inches off the ground. That means you have the entire distance of
your height between you and the ceiling now and it looks considerably
further away. And while it's true it may be further from your eyes or
the tip of your hand, where you are, your position, is still in the
same spot. This is what happens when we arrive at a trial in our life
that knocks us flat out our backs. We look back up at it, but it
feels so much further away and so much more overbearing and it seems
like all we can do to look up at it and ask ourselves, “How will I
recover from this one? How do I get back up and go forward again?”
It reminds me of a poem I read once
quoted by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland,
“It
darkens. I have lost the ford.
There
is a change on all things made.
The
rocks have evil faces, Lord,
And
I am [sore] afraid“
(Joseph
Hilaire Belloc, “The Prophet Lost in the Hills at Evening,” in
Lord David Cecil, ed.,The Oxford Book of Christian Verse (1940), 520.
)
Immediately following that quote
Elder Holland stated, “No, it is not without a recognition of
life’s tempests but fully and directly because of them that I
testify of God’s love and the Savior’s power to calm the storm.
Always remember in that biblical story that He was out there on the
water also, that He faced the worst of it right along with the newest
and youngest and most fearful. Only one who has fought against those
ominous waves is justified in telling us—as well as the sea—to
“be still.” He points out something we need to remember, Christ
is on the water with us. When we fall, He is sitting there next to
us. He has experienced that fall, and because of that He is able to
patch us up till we are able to stand on our feet again. He is able
to protect us from the predators who would take advantage of us in
our weakness and fend them off. He will guard us and then He will
help us stand and go forward again. Elder Dallin H. Oaks said, “I
have often pondered, Why is it that the Son of God and His holy
prophets and all the faithful Saints have trials and tribulations,
even when they are trying to do Heavenly Father’s will? Why is it
so hard, especially for them? I think about Joseph Smith, who
suffered illness as a boy and persecution throughout his life. Like
the Savior, he cried out, “O God, where art thou?” Yet even when
he was seemingly alone, he exercised his agency to wait upon the Lord
and carry out his Heavenly Father’s will.“ Again, he comments how
the son of God was there with us, as were His prophets, and had
trials and tribulations in the same manner. And for the same
purposes, to lift us closer to God.
Elder Oaks also stated, “Too often
we pray to have patience, but we want it right now!” It's true
though, we tell the Lord “Thy will be done in thy time,” but we
want it to be in our time. I guess that's why it's a test of our
patience. It's to see how long we will maintain that “Thy will be
done” state of mind, so that when He is truly ready, will we do His
will or not? “Such was the submission of our Savior to His Father
in the Garden of Gethsemane. He implored His disciples, “Watch with
me,” yet three times He returned to them to find their eyes heavy
with sleep. Without the companionship of these disciples and
ultimately without the presence of His Father, the Savior chose to
suffer our “pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind.”
With an angel sent to strengthen Him, He “shrank not to drink the
bitter cup.” He waited upon His Father, saying, “Thy will be
done,” and He humbly trod the winepress alone.” (Elder Oaks, Oct
2011 General Conference)
Knowing I follow Christ, I do not
find it surprising there will be times I will feel I trod the
winepress alone. How can I be expected to not be free of trials the
Master himself was not spared from? But that is the big difference.
He trod it alone, and while I may feel alone, I am not. He will trod
the winepress with me. He will not sleep while we suffer and endure
our trials, nor will He simply “watch with us” while we endure
them, but He will lift us up, He will support us and help us go
forward if we will but turn and go to Him with all we can muster.
Trust in the Lord as you endure your
trials and He will carry you forward. I know this because He has
carried me forward.
A note: Be aware of your interactions
with others and don't take out your stresses on others,
subconsciously or otherwise. And when the Lord sends people in to
your life to help you through those things, thank Him for those
people and don't push them away. They were not sent from Him to
burden you or stress you out, they were sent from Him because He knew
they would love you and care for you, and they are a means from Him to
help you through those hard times. And you never know, perhaps you
were sent to them to help them while they help you. The Lord sends
people into our lives. But we need to remember, while we are enduring
something, they are enduring something of their own. And they may
more may not be having a harder time than we are. So let us help each
other through life rather than pushing each other away. Let us follow
the example of Christ.
-Samuel
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